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I used to be a real ad
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Just as the founding fathers intended
I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Kripp BM pyroblasted the wrong guy
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Dear Kripp, you bmed me in a card heart game, punk. Bet you thought I had forgotten, but jokes on you I'm a military trained navy ranger. I can kill a man 10 times before he even realizes. I'm right now backtracing your house address and will be there soon. You bm pyroblasted the wrong guy punk, your dead
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Kripp
I will become the Fiora master
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As the pain of hunger overtook the people of Africa they began to feel hope. "I will become the Fiora master!" said Michael "Imaqtpie" Santana. The people of Africa cheered.
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imaqtpie
League of Legends
yang gang for life
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If my girl ๐ฉ and yang ๐ค both drowning ๐ฑ and I can only save one ๐ข catch me with my 1000 extra a month ๐ค๐ค because it's yang gang for life ๐ค๐๐๐
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Emoji Pasta
National Association for the Advancement of Urgot Players
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Dear Mr. Pie, I am from the NAAUP (National Association for the Advancement of Urgot Players) and myself and my organization has taken a notice to you never playing Urgot. We feel this is highly discriminatory and would ask that you rectify this by playing Urgot immediately. Thank you. 
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imaqtpie