[Copypasta] For people that use "XD"

twitchquotes: But the real question is, when this musing entered your mind, did you really make such a face? Was it so funny that your face contorted into a gaping wide-mouthed smile as your eyes aggressively squinted shut? Did you truly "ex dee"? Were you able to see your screen as you typed with your eyes held steadfast as though they were steel vice grips clamping with hundreds of pounds of force?
twitch chat
February 2019
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Coca Cola shortage

twitchquotes: THIS JUST IN: Stores across the world are reporting a major shortage of 'store brand Cola'. Sources indicate that over 20 million bottles were sold within minutes of an endorsement by some dirty Romanian living in Athens.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Making poops of different shapes

twitchquotes: Sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴡʜᴇɴ I ᴘᴏᴏᴘ, I ᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sʜᴀᴘɪɴɢ ᴀᴛᴛᴀᴄʜᴍᴇɴᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴍʏ ᴏʟᴅ Pʟᴀʏ Dᴏʜ ғᴜɴ sᴇᴛ. I ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇ ɪᴛ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ᴀɴᴜs, ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴘᴏᴏᴘs ɪɴ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ sʜᴀᴘᴇs. Tʜᴇʀᴇ's ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴀᴛ ᴀʟʟ. I'ᴍ ᴀɴ Aᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀɴ, ʟɪᴠɪɴɢ ɪɴ Aᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀ, ᴀɴᴅ ɪғ I ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴘᴏᴏᴘs sʜᴀᴘᴇᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ sᴛᴀʀs, I ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴛᴏ. Tʜᴇ ғᴏᴜɴᴅɪɴɢ ғᴀᴛʜᴇʀs ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ɪᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀʏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

The game of "shitpost" is a gentlemans' sport

twitchquotes: The game of "shitpost" is a gentlemans' sport played by high society clubs like S.M.E.G. on emoting grounds across twitch. To play, one player posts a satirical block of text to the pitch, usually with a paygated emote such as moon2SMEG . Next, the other players copy and paste the same message while simultaneously laughing at the misfortune of the lower class.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

Hello Kripp, this is Optimus Prime

twitchquotes: Ｈｅｌｌｏ Ｋｒｉｐｐ ｔｈｉｓ ｉｓ Ｏｐｔｉｍｕｓ Ｐｒｉｍｅ ｒｅｓｐｏｎｄｉｎｇ ｔｏ ｙｏｕｒ ｅｎｃｏｄｅｄ ｍｅｓｓａｇｅ． Ｗｅ ａｒｅ ｎｏｔ ｉｎｔｅｒｅｓｔｅｄ ｉｎ ｐｏｕｒｉｎｇ ｏｕｒ ｓｅｌｆ ｉｎ ＯＪ ｗｈｉｌｅ Ｔｏｐｄｅｃｋｉｎｇ Ｄｏｎｇｅｒｓ． Ｐｌｅａｓｅ ｂｅ ａｄｖｉｓｅ ｔｈａｔ ａｎｙｍｏｒｅ ｂｅｅｐｉｎｇ ｗｉｌｌ ｌｅａｖｅ ｍｅ ｎｏ ｃｈｏｉｃｅ ｂｕｔ ｔｏ ｐｅｐｐｅｒｏｎｉ ｔｈｅ Ｎａｚｉ ｍｏｄｓ．
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Lego City copypasta collection

Prepare for landing at LEGO city airport. The giant passenger plane has just arrived. Lower the luggage, and prepare for boarding. Hey! Build the stairs, board the passengers, and take off! The airport collection from LEGO city. There is a traffic jam at LEGO city. Stop! The main bridge is out and needs to be repaired! Hey! Bring in the giant crane, rig the crane, lift up the heavy road and help your city! The construction collection from LEGO city. There's a new fire station at LEGO city! Build the new fire station! Start the fire trucks! And rush out the garage! Hey! Open the garage door! Race to the rescue! And save your city! The new fire collection from LEGO city. The big container ship arrives at the new LEGO city harbour! Load the ship, with the big harbour crane! Hey! Build the crane, lift the heavy containers! Load the ship! And set out from the harbour! The new transport collection from LEGO city. Emergency in LEGO city harbour! The big container ship is on fire! Quick! To the fire station! You can launch the new fire boat! Hey! You can build the fire boat! Attach the motor! And rush out to put out the fire! The new fireboat is fast! Powerful! And perfect for the job! You can save the day! With the new fire boat in LEGO city! Batteries not included. Each set sold separately.
December 2020

Lego City

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing