[Copypasta] The whole twitch chat "sub-culture" is strange to me

twitchquotes: The whole twitch chat "sub-culture" is so... strange to me. I put on a streamer and the chat is just animated emojis of pepes and some random guy laughing, almost no actual conversation. And that's after installing the damn extension to see those things. Before it was just a constant barrage of "LUL pepega ezclap" and I had no clue what the fuck was going on, or what a monkAS was...
twitch chat
January 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Shout out to sidewalks for keeping me off the streets

twitchquotes: Pedestrian: i want to give a shout out to sidewalks for keeping me off the streets
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

Not financial advise

I'm starting to think the people telling me to buy BB at $20 were being serious about not being financial advisors
April 2021

WallStreetBets

I'm Kripp Harrison, and this is my Hearthstone stream

twitchquotes: I'm Kripp Harrison, and this is my Hearthstone stream. I work here with my dog and my wife, Rania the Succubus. Every arena run in here has a story and a price. One thing I've learned after 21 years - you never know WHAT my opponent is going to topdeck
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August 2016
Kripp

Rick Harrison

Hearthstone

No one RIOTS on my watch

twitchquotes: ̿ ̿'̿'̵з=༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽=ε/̵/’̿’̿ ̿ ̿[} ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿^ Stop right there criminal scum! no one RIOTs on my watch. I'm confiscating your goods. now pay your fine, or it's off to jail. ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿'̿'̵з=༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ YOU'RE UNDER ARREST FOR BEING CASUAL. COME OUT WITH YOUR DONGERS RAISED ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿'̿'̵з=༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
twitch chat
October 2014
Trick2g

You will never be Japanese

You will never be Japanese. You have no ancestry, you have no citizenship, you have no skills that would make Japan ever want you. You are a shut-in self-hating white man twisted by delusions of mythical Japanese superiority and exposure to Japanese media into a disgusting mockery of nature’s perfection. All 'validation' you get from other people in this position couldn't be worse in making you believe that spending years of your life learning a globally useless language to a first-grader's level was a worthwhile use of your time, but one can't expect that an individual as pathetic as you will ever know the value of the youth you threw away in doing that. Actual Japanese are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of linguistic evolution have allowed natives to identify frauds from mannerisms and vocabulary alone. Even if your written text of self-hatred and attention begging akin to a stray dog's somehow passes as normal (it won't), any Japanese person will immediately cut all ties when they hear the voice and accent of someone who is not only a basic Japanese speaker at best, but worth no more than garbage in skills, accomplishments, and likeability. You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile and laugh to yourself believing that watching a content creator that you understand 20% of at best is somehow superior than watching your own kind, as you project your disgusting traits onto your entire kind. However, deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight, and you know that. You know that all you do now is have an entirely new linguistic medium in which to be ignored, and not even the exotic trait of being foreign makes up for just how uninteresting of a person you are. Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a Western man is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably Caucasian. This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back. Hate yourself and apologize for being white to some Japanese entity that exists only in your mind while actual Japanese people put in effort to learn English for the valid reason of it being the global language.
April 2021

Weebs

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