[Copypasta] Fortnite that's how Mafia works

twitchquotes: Fortnite. Fortnite. Fortnite. It was all my two kids talked about. They were utterly devoted to it. I had to make a change. I took the controllers and told them they couldn't play until they downloaded Mafia City. They whined and whined, but soon became engrossed in this amazing and educational game. Fortnite soon forgotten, their grades improved rapidly, much like their levels in game. The teachers were amazed, "how do they do it?" they asked me, I simply replied "that's how Mafia works."
twitch chat
January 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp's history

twitchquotes: Paparrian was born in Germany, the youngest of the five children (three of whom survived) of Hanz Hector Paparrian, from a noble family of the province of Freiberg. In 1932, he began his medical career in Theodor Meynert's psychiatric clinic at the Trollstein General Hospital. The same year, he married Mamarrian, the granddaughter of Isaac Bernays, a chief rabbi in Hamburg. In the summer of 1935, the couple had a beautiful and gifted child: Kripp. On 15 September 1935, Hitler presented two laws who deprived so-called "non-Aryans" of the benefits of German citizenship. The young parents, extremely afraid for the future of their beautiful child, where confronted to a question that would forever change the fate of the world: was Krip Aryan?
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Response to "who gives a shit"

Well you see, if you didn't care you wouldn't have said "Literally no one gives a shit" in the first place. If you truly did not care, you would of completely ignored the conversation from the very start. The fact that you said that just shows the childishness inside of you. All that saying "no one gives a shit" does is make you out to be an entitled, lower person who craves attention by trying to seem cool. Even if you do not care about this statement, the mere fact that you are saying "no one gives a shit" says a lot about you. And shows that you are in fact an unlikable individual. Regardless of if you care of not, these are goddamn facts, and facts do not care about your little peabrained fucking pissbaby feelings. No amount of not caring will change your unlikableness. Nobody will forget this moment and it'll be embedded into our minds for months, even years. Grow up a little before even thinking about responding to another innocent person with "No one gives a shit".
April 2022

The Story of Kanye West

After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest. Then to school to take his Kanye Test. He forgot to brush his teeth. Did he run out of Kanye Crest? His neighbor stole it, what a Kanye Pest. He then puts on some axe for some Kanye zest and goes to the bar puffing out his Kanye chest. Gets drunk into a Kanye mess and goes home to the the Kanye West part of town. He realized his life was a wreck, and was feeling a little Kanye depressed. β€œMy life sucks he Kanye digressed. He decided to get some Italian to he flew to Kanye Trieste. He got some pasta and started to Kanye digest. You should get some Kanye rest his wife Kanye pressed. Instead he went to a Kanye fest. He then realized he needed to go to Dallas for his competition, so he went to the airport and hopped on Kanye southwest, got some Kanye rest, and the next morning was feeling ready for his Kanye contest. Or at least he Kanye guessed. On the day of the competition he was feeling a little Kanye stressed. But in the end the judges were Kanye impressed. For his performance he was awarded with the Kanye chest, clearly identified with the Kanye crest. There ends the story of Kanye West.
April 2021

Kanye West

Trolling My Office With Among Us (Part 4, Finale 1)

When I went to work the next day, I immediately ran to the elevator. I already saw Chad running towards me but it was already closed when he got to the elevator. It was travelling to my boss' office. When I got up I ran at him and kicked him out the window."You are s u s ." I said as I watched him fall out. His body splat on the pavement and was ran over by multiple cars below. I caused a traffic jam.I went back into the elevator and went to floor 5. I ran down the hall in the naruto run, you know the funny naruto run from anime? And I got on the intercom or whatever that shit is called."All crewmembers of the ship, please report to the bottom floor for an emergency meeting." I naruto ran down the stairs to the bottom floor. I stood on the table in the middle of the office and stomped."I HAVE CALLED AN EMERGENCY MEETING! THE BOSS IS DEAD! THE IMPOSTER KILLED HIM! WE NEED TO FIND OUT WHO THE IMPOSTER IS! Everyone was yelling at me to stop. But I wasn't gonna stop until I killed everyone here as the imposter.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Traumatized Mr Incredible

βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž– βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž– βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–
February 2022
Text-to-Speech Playing