[Copypasta] Fortnite that's how Mafia works

twitchquotes: Fortnite. Fortnite. Fortnite. It was all my two kids talked about. They were utterly devoted to it. I had to make a change. I took the controllers and told them they couldn't play until they downloaded Mafia City. They whined and whined, but soon became engrossed in this amazing and educational game. Fortnite soon forgotten, their grades improved rapidly, much like their levels in game. The teachers were amazed, "how do they do it?" they asked me, I simply replied "that's how Mafia works."
twitch chat
January 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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My daughter is dating a douche-bag (response to /r/cryptocurrency post)

My daughter is dating a douche-bag I don't know where I messed up, I thought I taught her well on what to look for in a man. The guy just showed up at my house and starting rambling on about how DCAing 30 dollars in 4 months into Safemoon helped him understand finance and geopolitics. I told him he was completely oblivious about being in a ponzi, this only unchained a what I believed to be a cocaine induced speech saying that Safemoon was going to be the next Bitcoin and he was going to moon while buying "lambos" for his friends because he was no "Bitch-ass paperhands". I'm a bank executive, so you can only imagine what a nightmare this is for me. Don't know what the point of this post is, is not like my daughter is going to stop dating that idiot anyways. I'm scared about my daughter's future.
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Sanity lost to Amogus

Ha...hahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That's it! I surrender! My sanity can't take this anymore! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I feel like killing someone! I'm not even joking!! I'M FEELING REALLY SUSNO no no i'm NOT sus, Amogus isn't real...but why are there VENTS all over my house?!?!?! OH NO...the power just went out...a fuse was blown...oh God, oh fuck!!! I have to go to ELECTRICAL!!! My roommate looking kinda SUS right now! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Among Us is painted on my walls in blood...I've been humming the Among Drip theme song to myself for three months now...SUS!!! IMPOSTER! RED VENTED!!! HAHAHAHAHA! KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

m'lady tip fedora

⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢯⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿ ⡇⣉⡙⠻⠁⠄⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⠌⠻⢿⣷⣦⣤⣀⡀⠄⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⠋⠄⢰⡆⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠋⣭⡛⣿⣿ ⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣉⣙⡿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣉⡙⢶⢹ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣭⣝⣛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠷⢶⣦⡤⢤⠘⣿⠄⡾ ⠄⠄⡔⢲⣤⣴⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣬⠍⠄⠄⢰⣾⣷⡆⠄⠄⣄⣤⣾⣧⡞⣱ ⠄⠘⣾⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⣸⣿⣍⡿⠿⠿⠇ ⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⡿⣿⣯⢻⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢱⣿⡏⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⣉⣉⡉⠉⠁⢿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⡁⣛⣿⣁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⣿⣶⣬⡙⠛⠛⠿⠟⠻⠿⠇⢀⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠈⠹⢿⣿⣿⣙⠿⢿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠻⣿⣷⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄m'lady
November 2021

Simps

Kripp and Trump

twitchquotes: Aʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡᴀs ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ʜɪs ʜᴇᴛᴇʀᴏsᴇxᴜᴀʟ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ. Nᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴜʏs ᴇxᴘᴏsᴇᴅ ʜɪᴍ, ʜᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ ғᴇᴇʟs? I ʙᴇᴛ ʜᴇ's ᴘʀᴇᴛᴛʏ ᴅᴇᴠᴀsᴛᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ ғᴏᴜɴᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴇɴᴛ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ʜɪs ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴀʏ.Yᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴀʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴀsʜᴀᴍᴇᴅ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟᴠᴇs.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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