[Copypasta] I'm not your typical 12 year old

twitchquotes: I'm twelve but everyone says I am very mature for my age and say I'm basically 16. Also, I love real bands like AC/DC and punk rock like green day so I'm not your typical 12 year old.
twitch chat
December 2018
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022

Shrek is love. Shrek is life

I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.
February 2021

Shrek

Classic

Lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army. It has come to our attention that you've been 'BroFisting' many of our citizens against their will. If you continue this, I have full authority to launch a nuclear attack against you and your evil 5 dollar club. You've been warned.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

coronaS

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣫⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠳⢿⣿⠟⣛⡽⠿⠛⠟⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⠋⡏⢱⠄⣀⣀⣤⣀⣁⠨⢻⡅⠐⠌⡈⠊⢏⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢁⠅⣨⠖⠋⠉⠀⡰⠬⠩⠙⠲⢷⠶⢖⠒⠒⢚⡻⠶⠿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣫⡞⢰⠉⡀⠀⠀⢔⣨⠴⠒⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⠓⢦⡨⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⠓⠚⠿⣟⣿ ⡿⢻⠃⡇⢈⠦⣡⠖⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣄⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣦⡀⠈⢿ ⠗⡈⠀⠊⠁⠀⣉⣛⡢⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠚⠃⠀⣠⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠋⢀⣠⣾ ⠀⠑⢤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠯⢵⣶⣶⣖⠒⣬⡭⠞⠉⢉⠉⠉⠉⣉⠉⢍⣷⣿⣿ ⠳⡀⠀⠉⠢⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠴⠚⠉⠀⠀⠙⠓⢦⡶⠶⢖⠺⣯⢿⣿⣿ ⣄⠈⢷⣄⠀⠈⠳⣄⣠⠤⠤⠤⠤⢤⣥⣀⣀⣠⣀⡤⠤⠤⠭⠁⠐⠒⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⡈⠑⣦⠈⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿ ⠛⢦⡀⠑⠨⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿ ⠀⠈⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣼⣿⣿ ⢥⣄⣀⡠⠬⠲⠦⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠙⠒⠿⢭⣿⣓⣲⠶⠶⠬⠭⠭⠿⠿⠶⠶⠶⣶⡶⢶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

Pepe

RIP the Kripparrian

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) i remember when seeing The Female Barbarian's Face in my Twitch TV Followers List made me happy inside to see the Kripparrian streaming, and see him farm endless hours of D3 or PoE, but now I just think of that succubus girlfriends he has and all the dogs barking and NAZIS shouting, RIP The Kripparrian ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing