[Copypasta] I'm not your typical 12 year old

twitchquotes: I'm twelve but everyone says I am very mature for my age and say I'm basically 16. Also, I love real bands like AC/DC and punk rock like green day so I'm not your typical 12 year old.
twitch chat
December 2018
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

Classic

I sexually Identify as

DVD logo

⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⡀ ⠀⢠⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠈⢹⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣇⠀⣠⣿⣿⠟⣽⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠃⢹⣿⣿⣶⣿⡿⠋⢰⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⣿⠏ ⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣸⣟⣁⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣻⡟⣻⣿⢻⣿⡟⣛⢻⣿⡟⣛⣿⡿⣛⣛⢻⣿⣿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀ ⠉⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠷⣼⣿⣿⣼⣿⣧⣭⣼⣿⣧⣭⣿⣿⣬⡭⠾⠿⠿⠿⠛⠉⠀
January 2021

.future gens will sit down and listen to...

twitchquotes: people sit with their children, tell them memories about mario, zelda, half life , dark souls, god of war , silent hill, resident evil , metroid.....future gens will sit down and listen to tales of T-Posing, fortnite dances and frying pans in battle royal games....and teach their kids the carlton and listen to the back pack kid and his flossing song.....may god have mercy on us all...
twitch chat
November 2019

It's called empathy

Sometimes watching porn I like to pretend I'm the "woman" it's called empathy not homosexuality.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

I once had sleep paralysis

twitchquotes: i once had sleep paralysis and i imagined Kripparian slowly slithering up to me and i felt the brush of his wirey beard press against my chest and his boulder-like face was a miillimeter away from mine and he whispered "..He had the perfect cerds" then drained all my RNG power right out of my chest. I cried for days.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing