[Copypasta] Listen to me, chat. You have a problem

twitchquotes: Listen to me, chat. You have a problem. We both know you're depressed, anxious, and unhealthy in general. You spend all day on Twitch enjoying games vicariously through others and spamming copypastas in chat. This has to stop. I'm asking you NOT to copy and paste this message, but go outside for a change. Get a new hobby. Make some friends. Turn over a new leaf. It's your only hope at this point.
twitch chat
April 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I once had sleep paralysis

twitchquotes: i once had sleep paralysis and i imagined Kripparian slowly slithering up to me and i felt the brush of his wirey beard press against my chest and his boulder-like face was a miillimeter away from mine and he whispered "..He had the perfect cerds" then drained all my RNG power right out of my chest. I cried for days.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

The pasta will be that pasta that youโ€™ve spammed

twitchquotes: I looked at this pasta originally, and I thought, you know, itโ€™s a pasta, and you spam this pasta. The pasta will be that pasta that youโ€™ve spammed, so youโ€™re spamming a pasta. So it is one thing to spam a pasta if your chat doesnโ€™t really have any pasta. The pasta will screw up the pasta pretty hard, and that means itโ€™s a pretty good pasta.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

SPAM THIS SLIME TO HELP C9

twitchquotes: SPAM BrainSlug THIS BrainSlug SLIME BrainSlug TO BrainSlug HELP BrainSlug C9
twitch chat
October 2018
Riot Games

Rhyme Chant

Would you like to get rich by running your own business

Hey๐Ÿ‘‹ ladies๐Ÿ’โ€โ™€๏ธ ๐Ÿ“ท Would ๐Ÿ˜ you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ like ๐Ÿ‘ to 2๏ธโƒฃ get ๐Ÿ˜ฎ rich ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ by running ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™€๏ธ your ๐Ÿ‘ˆ own business ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ’ผ๐Ÿ’ผ from home ๐Ÿก with just โ˜ your phone? ๐Ÿ“ฑ๐Ÿคณ Well ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™€๏ธ you can't. ๐Ÿ˜‚ Get ๐Ÿ‘ a ๐Ÿ‘ real ๐Ÿ‘ job ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ stupid ๐Ÿ‘ cunt
March 2021

Emoji Pasta

Kripp fills me completely with value

twitchquotes: I stayed up all night, dreaming of this moment. My pulse is racing. Discarded salt packets and OJ cartons are strewn across the filthy bedroom floor. "Oh look it's another sub," says the Kripp. I am now fully erect. "Welcome to the five dollar club, bro" I barely hear as a single tear runs down my cheek while Kripp's fist fills me completely with value.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing