[Copypasta] Listen to me, chat. You have a problem

twitchquotes: Listen to me, chat. You have a problem. We both know you're depressed, anxious, and unhealthy in general. You spend all day on Twitch enjoying games vicariously through others and spamming copypastas in chat. This has to stop. I'm asking you NOT to copy and paste this message, but go outside for a change. Get a new hobby. Make some friends. Turn over a new leaf. It's your only hope at this point.
twitch chat
April 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

How do I get my husband to stop going β€˜Goblin Mode’ during sex?

How do I get my husband to stop going β€˜Goblin Mode’ during sex? TLDR; My husband says β€˜Goblin Mode activated’ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says β€˜Goblin Mode off’ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward. I really love my husband and he’s always been great in bed. But recently he’s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in β€˜Goblin Mode’. We didn’t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. He’s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, he’s been a little emotionally unwell. I’ve heard him muttering, β€˜Goblin’ repeatedly when he didn’t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said β€˜Goblin Mode activated’, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex I’ve ever had, but I’m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice? Edit: The problem isn’t the β€˜Goblin Mode’, it’s that he could be ill
July 2022

Confessions

Classic

Doublelift: I don't make many mechanical mistakes

twitchquotes: I'm really confident that we'll be the way better bot lane. (Laughs) I see games where G2's bot lane is 100 CS down, losing tower, and getting killed 2 vs 2. I can't remember any games like that for us. CoreJJ and I don't make many mechanical mistakes and I think we play a lot cleaner in general. -- Doublelift 2019
twitch chat
May 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Give me another burger OpieOP

twitchquotes: OpieOP EU is so ba... OpieOP wait let me take a breath OpieOP EU is s... OpieOP i need to take another one OpieOP fk give me another burger OpieOP
twitch chat
April 2016

Classic

EU vs NA

Being a hentai actress must be so weird

Being a hentai actress must be so weird. Imagine this: you’re in a soundproof room pleasurably screaming into an 800,000Β₯ microphone about how much you love old man dick at 10:47 AM on a Tuesday in October while your 45-year-old boss oversees you through a glass window from the other room. You eventually look up after 2 hours of practicing your unnaturally high-pitched moans and see him give you a big thumbs up as you pretend to have an orgasm.
May 2021

Weebs

Anime girl 3

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–„β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–’β–β–β–β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–€β–„β–€β–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–’β–’β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–€β–€β–„β–β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–‘β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–β–β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–’β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–„β–€β–’β–β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–β–’β–€β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–’β–β–’β–’β–’ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’
ascii art
January 2017

Weebs

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing