[Copypasta] I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory

twitchquotes: I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory trying to provide pasta to hard-working people all across the world. After a long day of work, I come to Kripp's chat to unwind and have thought-driven discussions about my favorite game and favorite streamer. When I get here, however, all I see is pasta after pasta. All I want to do is escape my miserable life, but you fucks keep spamming.
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

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More Classic Copypastas

Kripp play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Kripp! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic card game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€ ~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride γ€€ γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

Classic

KappaPride

Don't ever smoke

twitchquotes: My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your stream gave me cancer anyway.
twitch chat
January 2020

Classic

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

GME $1000 IS NOT A MEME

πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€ UPVOTE/GILD SO PEOPLE CAN SEE πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€ LISTEN TO ME. DO NOT SELL TOMORROW. OR ANY DAY THIS WEEK. Drops are coming. They are counting on fear to beat us. It’s the only weapon they have on us, but it won’t work because we are retarded. The people are finally taking the power back from these boomer hedge fund big money shorting douchebags - the same people who fucked everyone over in 2008 with CDOs and continue to fuck you over to this day. Get ready to make Melvin throat hard retard dick. We only have strength if we stay in this TOGETHER. HOLD THE LINE. THE SHORT SQUEEZE HASNT HAPPENED YET. Don’t pussy out you fucking idiots. $1000 IS NOT A MEME. I love you all, you beautiful autistic bulls. Hang tight while we ride this thing into the FUCKING STRATOSPHERE. APES TOGETHER STRONG 🦍 πŸ’Ž πŸš€
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

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