[Copypasta] Dicks are so cute omg

twitchquotes: Dicks are so cute omg(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) when you hold one in your hand and it starts twitching its like its nuzzling you(/ω＼) or when they perk up and look at you like" owo nya? :3c" hehe ~ penis-kun is happy to see me!!（＾ワ＾)
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire

twitchquotes: I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire and prophetic indictments of contemporary Twitch chat. Copypasta when I was a younger teenager had the potency to topple Nazi moderatorships and revolutionize new chat epochs. Even the truncation of "copypasta" to "pasta" shows a lack of eloquence that speaks volumes. If, like me, you are a product of those better times and wish to see them return then speak out. Let the memers and Toucans know that real copypasta back.
twitch chat
July 2015

MODS

Classic

if doublelift has million number of fans i am one of them

twitchquotes: if doublelift has million number of fans i am one of them. if doublelift has ten fans i am one of them. if doublelift has no fans. that means i am no more on the earth. if world against doublelift, i am against the world. i love doublelift till my last breath... die hard fan of doublelift. Hit like if u think doublelift best & smart in the world
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

League of Legends

Infinite poop

twitchquotes: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

When I use this text, my brain cell begin to die

twitchquotes: ｗｈｅｎ ｉ ｕｓｅ ｔｈｉｓ ｔｅｘｔ， ｍｙ ｂｒａｉｎ ｃｅｌｌ ａｕｔｏｍａｔｉｃａｌｌｙ ｂｅｇｉｎ ｔｏ ｄｉｅ． ｙｅｔ ｉ ｃｏｎｔｉｎｕｅ ｔｏ ｃｏｐｙｐａｓｔａ ａｎｄ ｆｅｅｌ ｉ ｃｏｎｔｒｉｂｕｔｅ ｔｏ ｔｈｅ ｉｎｔｅｒｎｅｔ． ａｌｌ ｂｅｃｏｍｉｎｇ ｒｅｔａｒｄ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Classic

NA ULT LUL

twitchquotes: Listen up you fcking dweebs, this is a WAKE UP CALL to all those who type "NA ULT LUL". I'm from NA and let me tell you what happens when I use my Ultimate Ability (Q on PC, Triangle on PS4, Y on X-box 1). The enemy team is eviscerated. Decimated. Their souls are expelled from the server and banished to Hell. They wallow in their own filth and shit for 10,000 days and it is disgusting. So next time you type "NA ULT LUL" you fcking remember this post.
twitch chat
January 2017

Classic

Overwatch

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