[Copypasta] Albert Einstein watches Rick and Morty

twitchquotes: My teacher said to my I'm a failure, that I'll never amount to anything. I scoffed at him. Shocked, my teacher asked what's so funny, my future is on the line. "Well...you see professor" I say as the teacher prepares to laugh at my answer, rebuttal at hand. "I watch Rick and Morty." The class is shocked, they merely watch pleb shows like the big bang theory to feign intelligence, not grasping the humor. "...how? I can't even understand it's sheer nuance and subtlety." "Well you see...WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB!" One line student laughs in the back, I turn to see a who this fellow genius is. It's none other than Albert Einstein.
twitch chat
September 2017

Classic

Rick and Morty

I used to be a real ad
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Gachi pose

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ascii art
November 2018
Forsen

Classic

KappaPride

I just downvoted your comment FAQ (Reddit)

I just downvoted your comment. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of karma (points) on your comment and Reddit account has decreased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be unworthy of positive or neutral karma. These include, but are not limited to: • ⁠Rudeness towards other Redditors, • ⁠Spreading incorrect information, • ⁠Sarcasm not correctly flagged with a /s. ## Am I banned from the Reddit? No - not yet. But you should refrain from making comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to issue an additional downvote, which may put your commenting and posting privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved a downvote. Can you un-downvote it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a downvote. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a private message explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to Reddit PMs within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of downvote appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the downvote and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated on Reddit.com. I will continue to issue downvotes until you improve your conduct. Remember: Reddit is privilege, not a right.
March 2021

Classic

Reddit

Unidan "jackdaw is a crow"

Here's the thing. You said a "jackdaw is a crow." Is it in the same family? Yes. No one's arguing that. As someone who is a scientist who studies crows, I am telling you, specifically, in science, no one calls jackdaws crows. If you want to be "specific" like you said, then you shouldn't either. They're not the same thing. If you're saying "crow family" you're referring to the taxonomic grouping of Corvidae, which includes things from nutcrackers to blue jays to ravens. So your reasoning for calling a jackdaw a crow is because random people "call the black ones crows?" Let's get grackles and blackbirds in there, then, too. Also, calling someone a human or an ape? It's not one or the other, that's not how taxonomy works. They're both. A jackdaw is a jackdaw and a member of the crow family. But that's not what you said. You said a jackdaw is a crow, which is not true unless you're okay with calling all members of the crow family crows, which means you'd call blue jays, ravens, and other birds crows, too. Which you said you don't. It's okay to just admit you're wrong, you know?
October 2021

Classic

How do I get my husband to stop going ‘Goblin Mode’ during sex?

How do I get my husband to stop going ‘Goblin Mode’ during sex? TLDR; My husband says ‘Goblin Mode activated’ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says ‘Goblin Mode off’ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward. I really love my husband and he’s always been great in bed. But recently he’s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in ‘Goblin Mode’. We didn’t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. He’s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, he’s been a little emotionally unwell. I’ve heard him muttering, ‘Goblin’ repeatedly when he didn’t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said ‘Goblin Mode activated’, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex I’ve ever had, but I’m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice? Edit: The problem isn’t the ‘Goblin Mode’, it’s that he could be ill
July 2022

Confessions

Classic

Imagine spamming chat

twitchquotes: Imagine going to an online chat and spamming it with brainless text for no reason.
twitch chat
April 2019

Classic

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