[Copypasta] Roses are red, I'm flexing today

twitchquotes: 💪 😂 roses are red 💪 😂 violets are blue 💪 😂 i'm flexing today 💪 😂 why aren't you?? 💪 😂
twitch chat
September 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

American website, American computers, American game

twitchquotes: Europoors hating on USA ✓ on a American website ✓ with American computers ✓ on the American invented Internet ✓ watching an American made game ✓ From a country that was liberated and protected by America ✓✓✓
twitch chat
June 2016

Classic

EU vs NA

sumSmash

⣽⣤⣄⠟⡟⣄⣀⣼⣟⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢻⣿⡟⠘⠓⠙⠛⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠻⣿⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⠟⣠⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⡙⢿⣿⢃⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⠛⠯⠛⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣋⣛⣑⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠘⣦⣀⠈⢨⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢩⠄⢈⠄⠤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣴⣧⢧⡤⣤⣀⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠈⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡄⠄⠄ ⣴⣿⡿⠛⠈⣧⠘⠉⠳⡄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⠂⠸⢷⡄⠈⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢃⠉⢀⠛⠄⡏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣦⣴⠎⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⢿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Summt1g

forsenCD PICK A CARD

twitchquotes: forsenCD PICK A CARD ✨ forsenCD ANY CARD ✨ forsenCD THE 2 OF WIVES? ✨ forsenCD EXCELLENT CHOICE ✨
twitch chat
November 2019
OfflineTV

Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021

abortion is 300$, plan B is 30$, a condom is 5$, but being gay is free

abortion is 300$, plan B is 30$, a condom is 5$, but being gay is free. the choice is yours. Don't bother trying to escape, i've connected a car battery to your balls.
April 2022
Text-to-Speech Playing