[Copypasta] I'm just a poor pasta maker

twitchquotes: I'm just a poor pasta maker struggling to make a living in this world. I may not be as fast as those big pasta factories with their fancy machines, but I am committed to providing you a quality pasta experience. I use only the freshest and dankest artisanal memes, and I can assure you that when you RIP in spaghetti, you'll never forgetti.
twitch chat
January 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

without throwing your cat across the room

twitchquotes: Hello this is Twitch staff. Unfortunately we have been notified that you have now reached 24 hours of stream time without throwing your cat across the room. As stated in our TOS, we require that all streamers must throw at least one pet a distance of 3 metres on camera in order to maintain the ability to stream. Failure to do so will result in your stream being disabled permanently. We will now unfortunately have to terminate your account. Thank you for your cooperation.
twitch chat
November 2019

Is this chat filled with parrots?

twitchquotes: Is this chat filled with parrots? All you guys do is copy what the person above you wrote. Please have some originality and contribute to a smarter chat.
twitch chat
August 2014

I hate Twitch Chat

Kirby with gun

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘ โ–„โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
October 2018

Flex your Dongers for Harambe

twitchquotes: แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•— Flex your Dongers for Harambe! แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•—แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•— Flex your Dongers for Harambe! แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•—
twitch chat
August 2016

Harambe

Hello gentleman, I have suffered a loss of 69K

Hello gentleman, I regretfully wish to share with you all that I shant comment on this Internet forum henceforth. As of the time of my arrival in this past autumn, I have suffered a loss of 69K. By the blessing of Lady Luck, I am still experiencing a positive net balance of 420%, so I have come to the conclusion I must liquidate my insignificant phallus account. I shall use this fortune for procuring a vaginal enlargement and acquire tremendous breasts for my OnlyAristocracy parchment. Or I may be devilish and maintain an investment position in TournamentCease. I am short of hours of leisure in life, training dogs to consume peanut butter from the reaches of my posterior and can not bare the rapid change of value of my investment holdings of 40 point 7 grand. I am aware that you, my peers of this financial derivatives Internet forum are filled with ecstasy to become privy to this, so copulate with yourself, I desire you all to be ablaze in nonheteronormative ursine hell in tandem with Sadam.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

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