[Copypasta] Twitch staff Golden Kappa

twitchquotes: ItsBoshyTime Twitch Staff here, one person in this channel will be randomly given golden Kappa in the next few minutes minutes but only if you type Kappa, good luck! ItsBoshyTime
twitch chat
August 2016
I used to be a real ad
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Not funny I didn't laugh

Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all. The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny. Honestly if I put in all my power and time to try and make your joke funny it would require Einstein himself to build a device to strap me into so I can be connected to the energy of a billion stars to do it, and even then all that joke would get from people is a subtle scuff. You're lucky I still have the slightest of empathy for you after telling that joke otherwise I would have committed every war crime in the book just to prevent you from attempting any humor ever again. We should put that joke in text books so future generations can be wary of becoming such an absolute comedic failure. Im disappointed, hurt, and outright offended that my precious time has been wasted in my brain understanding that joke. In the time that took I was planning on helping kids who have been orphaned, but because of that you've waisted my time explaining the obscene integrity of your terrible attempt at comedy. Now those kids are suffering without meals and there's nobody to blame but you. I hope you're happy with what you have done and I truly hope you can move on and learn from this piss poor attempt
September 2019

Classic

Roblox has taken over my sons life

Roblox has taken over my sons life, I need someone here to help me, it started off pretty small, he told me he was into this game called Roblox. I looked it over, seemed nice. That was 5 years ago, now my son has locked himself inside his room, using a pile of roblox toy plastic to guard me from opening it. When he comes out (The 1 time he does a week) he carries 5 bottles of empty soda pop filled with human waste and empty bags of food and throws them away. He will not speak to me, and will not leave the house, only will play Roblox. I've tried it all, but he seems to find a way to play roblox. I tired killing the WiFi but he payed someone in robux to let him have his, so he has his own wifi source, and trying to take away his PC causes him to go into a fit of terror, where he'll scream "ROBLOX ESCAPE THE BOSSBABY RAINBOW OBBY FIGDET SPINNER" until he gets it back please someone tell me how I stop this. I've tried doing a thing I call "Good Robloxian Robux" where I give him Robux when he does good things, like come out of his room, or doesn't use more then 20+ hours of wifi a day but it only works so much please someone tell me how I can get my son back, I miss that boy, he's 25 now, and needs a job
March 2021

Hearthstone is 100% luck

twitchquotes: This game is 100% luck. Example: Today I am playing hunter. I arcane shot face turn 1 and he topdecks voodoo doctor like wtf can’t deal with these lucky draws
twitch chat
January 2019

Hearthstone

Learn the ways of the Russians

twitchquotes: Learn the ways of the Russians, speak their language for a while, they might think you are one of them. Then maybe join their team, success might come and fighting for last drink of vodka will be your next objective. Do not give up, you have Dota tournament ahead of you. Then win TI1, but don't stop now, you have to go deeper. Spend 3 more years trying to solve the puzzle of russki power of motherland and then leave the team with full knowledge of understanding of strenght of ROSSIA and PROMISE URSELF THET YU WILL NEVER LOS TO RUS AND KNOW OF COLLAPSING STRONG EMPIRE OF RUSKILAND.
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

I'm epic gamer style

twitchquotes: Yeah I’m not surprised your girl wants to leave you for me. Not my fault I’m fucking epic gamer style. Why wouldn’t she wanna be with me lol I have a 3.2 kd in Fortnite, backseat game in Twitch chats, and I reddit hard as fuck. Sorry for being too dope
twitch chat
May 2019
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