[Copypasta] Twitch staff Golden Kappa

twitchquotes: ItsBoshyTime Twitch Staff here, one person in this channel will be randomly given golden Kappa in the next few minutes minutes but only if you type Kappa, good luck! ItsBoshyTime
twitch chat
August 2016
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Entire screen goes gray ever 30 seconds

twitchquotes: Hey qtpie, you should check your video settings after this game, there seems to be an issue with the stream. The colors of the video fade and entire screen goes gray every 30 or so seconds
twitch chat
August 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team

twitchquotes: Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team contacting you due to your expertise in the game known as League of Legends. We wanted to invite you here, to riot studios, to singlehandedly write the code for the next big patch, rebalancing the game anyway you want! we know youre a much better player, coder, and balancer of games than we are. Thank YOU T1!!!
twitch chat
April 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Same

twitchquotes: The time was 1:53 AM. This is the last game of my plat promos. The season will end in 7 minutes. We're down by bot turret with our team as we push our lead. I see Scott rolling in as Rammus, traveling at a speed that would put Sonic himself to shame. His words echo through my $5 earbuds. "I'M GOING IN!" I pause to take in the world around me. I can do anything right now. Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual limits no longer apply to me. I gather the strength in my forefinger as I slowly lift it over my R key. I say...no, I yell, with the ferocity of a million suns, the single word that could be heard around the world. "Same!" Galio prepares himself before leaping into the air, and delivering a devastating blow to the enemies' backline. We did it. The enemy team retreats back into their low elo. I was platinum. With a farewell to Scott for his outstanding work, I drag myself to my bed, ready to fall asleep. My phone chimes. Checking the notifications, I saw only one. A text from Clown9 Sneaky. The message brought a tear to my eye. The message simply read: “I’m proud of you.” Now very emotional, I typed a reply. "Same."
twitch chat
July 2020
Sneaky

League of Legends

ZULUL 2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠏⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠄⠈⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣠⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⢀⡀⠄⠤⠤⠤⠤⠄⢠⣀⣤⣍⡻⣿⣧⡀⠤⢀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣵⡇⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⢒⠄⣀⠄⠠⠘⢨⣈⢿⣿⣿⣤⣤⡚⠫⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠂⠄⣰⣿⣆⢿⠋⣀⣀⣰⡏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣧⠄⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠄⠈⠁⠚⠛⠛⠙⠻⢿⣟⠛⣉⠄⠁⠉⢩⣼⠁⠓⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⣾⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡷⠉⢀⣿⡏⣼⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠉⠉⣉⠉⣩⠉⡉⠙⠻⣿⣷⡴⠿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠋⠛⠛⠛⠋⠛⠉⠒⠻⠛⠁⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠙⠛⠓⠒⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣏⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
December 2018

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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