[Copypasta] Arrogant globaphopic

twitchquotes: This offends me as a vegan transgender atheist who vapes and crossfits 4 times a week and im also a male feminist as I identify myself as a pastafarian apache helicopter dog mega multi combo god of hyper death and if you dont agree with me. You're an ignorant arrogant globaphobic sexist lesbian
twitch chat
May 2016
I used to be a real ad
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Let us out lettuce points

twitchquotes: Lettuce (Lactuca sativa) was first discovered by Octavian Morosan in 2019. A leafy, green vegatable, he named it lettuce after the frantic cries from his wife and two dogs chained in the basement of, "Let us out!"
twitch chat
March 2019
Kripp

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: • ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight • ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor • ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) • ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns • ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man • ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" • ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos • ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) • ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

Pro players that go to tournaments are not the best

twitchquotes: The "pro" players that go to tournaments and stuff are NOT the best players in the world, not even close. These are just the best players of the type of losers who have the personality deficiency that compels them to actually go to gaming tournaments.
twitch chat
April 2019

CmonBruh bruh

⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠘⠛⠂⠄⠄⠉⠙⢻⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⣩⣄⠄⠄⠛⠷⠄⠄⢀⣾⠗⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣄⣙⠻⣿⡿⠿⠃⢀⣼⣿ ⣿⡿⢡⣿⣿⣿⣷⡴⢄⣤⣶⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣶⣶⡄⠉⠉⠙⢿⡆⢀⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⠃⠸⠿⠿⠛⠛⠶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠻⣶⣼⣶⣦⣤⣄⡀⢀⣀⡺⠋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡟⠄⠄⠄⠤⠾⠄⠄⣈⣛⠋⠉⠹⠆⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠁⢸⡟⢛⣿⣿⣿ ⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠶⢤⣴⣿⣉⡁⠄⢤⣾⣿⣿⢿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⠙⠿⣿⣶⣬⣍⣉⠛⠲⠄⠈⠉⠁⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⠀⠰⠛⠻⢿⣿⠿⠿⠟⡿⠿⢿⣿⠿⠿⣿⠃⠀⠟⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠀⠀⣴⡄⠀⠘⡇⠀⣤⣤⡇⠀⣼⣿⠀⢠⡏⠀⢠⣦⠀⠀⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠀⠀⠛⠃⠀⡼⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀⠀⠛⠃⠀⢸⠁⠀⣼⡏⠀⢠⡟⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣶⣶⣿⣷⣶⣾⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
July 2022

Emote

Thinking of the greatest Hearthstone player

twitchquotes: Sometimes, late at night when I am under my covers, I touch my stealth donger and think of the greatest hearthstone player, the very best there ever was, then in a desperate attempt to not fap i think of Kripp, and that's it, donger is gone, i whisper "casual" and go back to sleep.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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