[Copypasta] You have been hand picked to be recruited by the FBI

twitchquotes: Hey YOU. Yes YOU! You are the only one who can see this message. You have been hand picked to be recruited by the FBI. But in order to hire you we need to know that you are on your alert, even if it comes to text in a chat box. Please copy and paste this so we know that you have seen it. Good luck and God Bless.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
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More Kripp Copypastas

Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here. We noticed that your streams are interesting and entertaining. To fix this issue, we have decided to offer you money to play our very uninteresting and boring card game that is clearly a clone of Hearthstone. We look foward to future business with you and hope that you can sellout out a little bit more in the future. ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

Ingesting too much salt can cause casualness

twitchquotes: Studies show that ingesting too much salt can kill healthy bacteria in your digestive track, this can cause side-effects ranging from a weak immune system, acid reflex, and being a casual...
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Cybrix's voice

twitchquotes: Dear Cybrix, I have been severely depressed over the last month and have contemplated suicide. After hearing your voice, I now realize I have nothing left to live for and will kill myself this week.... Thanks for making my decision so easy OpieOP
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

A middle-aged man complaining about an online card game

twitchquotes: ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ-ᴀɢᴇᴅ ᴍᴀɴ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴄʜɪʟᴅʀᴇɴ ʙᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ᴀɴ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ ᴄᴀʀᴅ ɢᴀᴍᴇ. ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴘᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ $4.99 ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ sᴏ. ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄᴏɴsɪᴅᴇʀ ᴘᴜᴛᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ɪɴ ᴘᴇʀsᴘᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʙɪɢ ʙᴀʙʏ.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Rank 25 Casual

twitchquotes: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮Hey Vegeta, what does the scouter say about Kripp's powerlevel? Its over Rank 25 CASUAL!!! ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing