[Copypasta] Coca Cola shortage

twitchquotes: THIS JUST IN: Stores across the world are reporting a major shortage of 'store brand Cola'. Sources indicate that over 20 million bottles were sold within minutes of an endorsement by some dirty Romanian living in Athens.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp, this is Aquaman, King of the Seas

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Aquaman, King of the Seas, and I need your help. The salinity of our oceans has reached an all-time low, and only you, with your incredible salt output, can restore them to their proper levels. The fate of countless species of fish and other marine life rests in your scrawny vegan hands. Lend me your aid and I will reveal the ancient Atlantean cure for male-pattern baldness! Aquaman out!
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

This is our town SCRUB

twitchquotes: (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง This is our town SCRUB (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง(ง •̀_•́)ง Yeah beat it! (ง •̀_•́)ง
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Leifman the Salt King can save the world

twitchquotes: A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Salt king, a moderator named Leifman. And although his moderating skills are great, he still has a lot to learn before he's ready to save any chat. But I believe Leifman can save the world.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Asian Dude from Heartharena here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Asian Dude from Heartharena here. We've noticed you've been away from our website for a long time. Is it the Classic Aggro? We've adjusted our tier list to your more Classic Greed style. Please come back. Best regards, Classic Asian Dude from Heartharena
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

When a stream sniper looks at a stream, it's seen as a bit of naughty fun

twitchquotes: When a Stream Sniper looks at a stream, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when Kripp orders a 420YoloQuickSc0peR MLG 5000 Stream Sniper Rifle with a 10/10 BM magazine, orange juice holder, Cattarian reticle, with custom well met rounds, and an optional built in asshurt detection system, he's a casual.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing