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Hearthstone copypastas

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  • 154
    154
    twitchquotes:Hello, my name is Boris Ilya Pistolento. I'm from a small village in cold Siberia. For many years I dreamed of a profession, Cardstone player! But tetris all I can do. One day a trucker was crash in the back of the house of mine and a box fell out. It was the commodore 64, my dreaming is comming to reality. Now I can join the local tournamento, the prize pool of which 4 potatoes. Please no Copy-Pasta!
  • (ง •̀_•́)ง ONE DAY I'LL BE A REAL AD (ง •̀_•́)ง
  • 2
    2
    twitchquotes:Kripps anguish in his expression is palpable, his gray eyes burning. 'im going to CHUGGA,' he murmurs, his voice full of longing. I brace my self for his cold hard thrust. his ice lance pierces. As he presses closer, my breathing quickens. He has lethal, my body explodes.
  • 2
    2
    twitchquotes:I gasp in horror as Kripp pulls out his "huge gun". It can only be described as a Twisting Nether. He says "I got lethal now ". Then he topdecks Blizzard and frosts my face. I groan as he grabs my package and whispers "No sniperinos on my stream..." Then he continues to Gorehowl me.
  • 2
    2
    twitchquotes:Hey Kripp remember you don't play for the gold or for the wins, you play to feel the emotion on the topdick, the PJSalt on the defeat, you live for the BM, because you can be one with your cards, but mostly because at least through the match you're free. plz no linguini
  • 2
    2
    twitchquotes:Hi chat and forsen, I am wondering what I can replace auctioneer for in my Miracle rogue deck, do you think Goldshire Footman will work? Thanks and hope you suggest good cards. Greetings from Nigeria
  • 2
    2
    twitchquotes:I beat Kripp once, but my deck was insane, I topdecked the exact cards I needed for lethal, actually Kripp played it perfectly, there was nothing he could do, it was such a joke.
  • 180
    180
    twitchquotes:In the beginning Reynad created the Hearth and the Stone. There were no cards nor a meta. Then Reynad said "Let there be cards"; and there were cards. He then said "Let there be a Meta"; and there was a Meta. ~ The Book of Dennisis
  • 339
    339
    twitchquotes:When Kripp gets topdecked, it's seen as a bit of salty fun. BUT when Reynad gets a 420 YOLO Rag Pro 5000 hit to the face with 6 different minions on the board, lethal next turn, together with top-deck skill command with one mana webspinner, he's called Salt God?
  • 2128
    2128
    twitchquotes:(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) This is the 0-3 Police, You're coming with us Kripp. (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
  • (ง •̀_•́)ง ONE DAY I'LL BE A REAL AD (ง •̀_•́)ง
  • 4
    4
    twitchquotes:My beautiful Hafu turns to me in bed and kisses me. Her cute smile fills me with happiness. Hafu holds me close as she whispers in my ear: "You know this isn't real. You're just typing in twitch chat. You're alone." "10/10 body." I miss lethal.
  • 7
    7
    twitchquotes:Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
  • 3
    3
    twitchquotes:Every morning, I wake up only to watch Kripp play Hearthstone arena. I decide to subscribe to Kripp, join the '5-dollar club', to be part of Kripp himself. 'Welcome', Kripp exclaims, 'to the 5-dollar club!'. He gives the stream a brofist. I feel Kripp fisting me through the stream. A silent tear of joy escapes my eye.
  • 2
    2
    twitchquotes:Amaz moans hard as Kripp gropes his smallish package. “Pepperoni” Kripp whispered into Amaz’s elvish ear, as they started making out. “Do…do I win?” Amaz says tentatively, as Kripp slowly tugs away his pants. “Your deck is crazy” Kripp says, as he flips Amaz on his back. “It’s lethal guys” Amaz says playfully, as he presents his Twisting Nether.
  • (ง •̀_•́)ง ONE DAY I'LL BE A REAL AD (ง •̀_•́)ง
  • 3
    3
    twitchquotes:Kripp, Trump, Kolento, and Hafu. The 4 streamers lived in harmony then everything changed when the Trump nation attacked. Only, Kripp master of all the OJ, could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he bmed.